Upcountry is living on the side of the volcano. The elevation where I live is 1800 feet above sea level. The reason that people like it up here is that the weather is cooler, the price of homes less expensive, and they like spiders. They must, because there are lots of them here, and big ones too.  I DON’T LIKE SPIDERS.

This morning my daughter, who is 13, shouted one of those “Dad” alarms, the kind that tell you something is very wrong, and I came out of my bedroom as she was pointing into hers. She had flipped on the light switch, and on her wall was a huge, nasty spider. The kind you get in nightmares. Not sure if he was looking for a small dog or cat to eat, we don’t have a pet. Of course I had to balance my Dad will take care of it with my heart pounding from shock. I grabbed a mop out of the closet, and in short order he was disappearing down the toilet.

This wasn’t my first encounter with the beasts. A couple of weeks after I moved in, I opened the lid of the washer (it’s in the carport), turned on the water, and when I was about to put the detergent in, a big nasty was trying to climb out. Scared the you know what out of me. Needless to say I am a bit apprehensive about that washer now.

The second time was about three weeks ago. I opened the louvered folding door to the linen closet, and I could see one duck behind the louvers. I climbed in my car, went to Home Depot, and bought a huge bottle of bug killer. When I got home I doused the closet. Sure enough, about three hours later, he was crawling on the floor, looking like he had a huge hangover. Down the toilet went that one too.

In researching the beast, I think it’s called a Cane Spider, which is common in Maui, and can grow up to 4 inches.  4 inches is a pretty small fish, but a 4 inch spider on your wall looks like something right out of Aliens.  Supposedly, they seldom bite, and kill lots of other bugs, which is fine with me. Just do it outside. In fact, I live in the midst of lots of trees, and have come to accept the abundance of webs surrounding my house. I figure its like having a natural screen house, since I don’t have one. I don’t like how they spin their webs in the carport every night, and you walk into them getting in your car. You always wonder if you have one on your head or back.

But for today I promised my daughter to spray her room, and wash her bedding. She said she would not be sleeping in it if I didn’t. Smart girl.

                                                                The beast, about to be flushed. Sorry, bug lovers.